Non-Jews are for practice
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
