I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize