just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize