Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
