So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
