So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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