There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
