she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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