Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
