she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
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