trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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