I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I'm way too hungover for life right now
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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