Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
