found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
