Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
