You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
