Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
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