you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
