I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
