her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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