i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
