If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
