It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize