I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
