best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
