Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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