Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
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