Porn is love you can see.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize
