i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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