we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize