I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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