...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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