I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
