Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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