Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Randomize
