Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
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