It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
