i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Randomize
