What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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