so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
