a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
