i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
