just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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