You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
It was like getting head from an anaconda
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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