I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
