Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
And then he peed in my hair
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