my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
My life is pants optional.
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