So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
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