dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
