it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
