On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Drunk is a universal language darling
Randomize