Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize